Building Connection In Your Relationship

Someone once told me that a relationship is a “relation” plus “ship”. Two people on a ship together. Two people on a journey together. 

A question that couples ask me is, how do we build connection?

Here is the most basic answer. 

To build connection you must interconnect values. 

Couples that create values and understand how to implement the values in the relationship can prioritize what is important while decreasing discontent and disconnect. As an example, a person who values communication in their relationship may prioritize having daily conversation with their partner focused on intimacy or if emotional needs are being met.

As a fun activity to support your goal of building connection in your relationship practice the activity below:

Step 1: Write down 2 values for your relationship.

Step 2: With each value, create 1 example of how it can come to life (be action oriented). 

Step 3: After both have written responses, take time to share the values and how they can be action oriented in the relationship.

For example, let’s say that the value is communication. To allow this value to be action oriented, you can have bi-weekly check-ins. The check-ins are kind of like mini counseling sessions where you sit down and discuss how you feel about each other and the relationship.

During this time, you can talk about your concerns, what is going great in the relationship, or if you feel cherished. Again, the goal is to give life to the values by making them action orientated. Working on your values directly nourishes the connection in your relationship.

Working on connection is a subject that directly helps cuoples who have experiened dififuclties connected to infedility, conflict, or those who desire to spark the relationship. To explore how relationship counseling can help your relationship click here.