How Therapy Helps Clients Rebuild After Separation Or Divorce
There are certain experiences in life that simply cannot be explained. Divorce or separation is one of those. You have to live through the experience to truly comprehend the whirlwind that takes place.
The late nights trying to research the perfect divorce attorney. The one that can help while not leaving you in a position to see your bank account dwindle.
Experiencing a divorce can cause a person to feel crippled and overwhelmed. If kids are involved, the challenge can even be more difficult. Not too long ago, a client reached out wanting help with her divorce. She shared that the divorce process left her exhausted in all areas of her life. She felt disconnected from her identity.
Today, reflect on your life.
- What has life been like for you after the end of the relationship?
- Have you struggled to remain connected to your authentic self?
- Have you experienced difficulties with practicing self-care?
- Have you noticed that you simply just do not feel yourself after the divorce?
If the answers are YES.
How divorce counseling can help you rebuild your life:
Build awareness with the stages of divorce
Learn how to navigate the stages of divorce. The stages of divorce are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Each stage has its own unique experience.
Working with a divorce therapist near you can give you the tools to understand what commonly takes place in each of the divorce stages. You can learn how to build effective coping skills to address the negative symptoms both emotional and physical that take place during the divorce stages.
To read more about the stages of divorce click here.
Reconnect to your authentic self to heal after a divorce
Some people go through a divorce and in the end notice that everything piles on. It’s an interesting experience.
What happens is that during the divorce process you are in what is called survivor mode. This mode keeps you going and pushing forward.
Then, once everything settles. The big court fights are completed. You start to notice that all the feelings hit you like a brick wall.
- You are not sleeping well.
- Your anxiety is up.
- You notice that you struggle to maintain a connection to your values and purpose.
- You simply do not feel yourself.
Working with a divorce counselor gives you the opportunity to learn how to create healthy values and engage in daily activities that promote your values. This simple shift will give you purpose in life, develop empowerment, and spark the internal feelings connected to your authentic self. A supportive podcast that talks about reaching necessary ends in a relationship can be found HERE.
Slow downing helps to heal after a break-up
The practice of slowing down is one that is often overlooked when it comes to rebuilding your life after divorce or separation.
Slowing down is essential.
Here is what slowing down looks like.
You are at home and feeling overwhelmed. You see the dishes that need to be done. You are behind on payments. You feel this urge to jump-start your life and complete all of the tasks in front of you.
It is during this moment that you instead, sit.
You sit down and close your eyes to breathe and practice gratitude. You do this simply and profoundly practice for 2 minutes.
Inhaling and exhaling consciously. Reflecting on all the reasons that you are grateful.
At the end of the 2 minutes, you open your eyes.
You see that everything in life is still waiting for you. This reminds you that a to-do list is never complete.
You smile and recognize that life can wait.
Healing after divorce
It’s important to give your compassion and generous self-love to help heal after a divorce.
- Divorce is difficult.
- Divorce is challenging.
- Divorce is a stage of life that hits hard and can create a negative snowball effect.
Experiencing a divorce can cause physical and psychological negative symptoms. After a divorce you may feel:
- Emotionally lost.
- Waves of emotions have ups and downs.
- Experiencing mood changes.
- Struggling to start new relationships in a way that you truly open yourself up again.